Buh-bye 2011

Happy New Year! I am sooo excited to get this new year rolling! The next year is going to be a GOOD one! I came up with a short list of 12 things I want to accomplish in 2012:
1. Lose 50 pounds
2. Lose 75 pounds
3. Lose 100 pounds
4. Lose 125 pounds
5. Be able to look "somewhat" decent for my brothers wedding in the end of June.
6. Be able to play with my kids more.
7. Be able to fit my butt on our camper toilet easier! ick- I know!
8. Start on an exercise routine and stick to it!
9. Plan our family trip to Disney World for next Jan. and not be afraid of the airline reservations!
10. I would LOVE to get into a size 18.
11. Get to a size 16
12. JUST BE HAPPY!

I want sooo much more but some things are still to hard to talk about. I will get there! I want to be more organized to and some of that is because I feel so down in the dumps being overweight that I'm just plain LAZY! That is going to be NO MORE! I've bitten the bullet, plunked down $15,000 to have this surgery and I WILL NOT let that money go to waste! That is a huge chunk out of my families nest egg and childrens future for it not to work. It will be 4 weeks on monday and it is now 25 pounds! WOO HOOO! Let 2012 ROCK!  Over and out!

The End of the Year the End of the Old ME!

Tomorrow is New Years Eve! I have been "banded" for 25 days and I have lost 23 lbs. so far. I wish I would be able to keep that up and lose a lb. a day,  but I know that is a pipe dream. My wish for the next year is for the weight to drop quickly and easily. HA! I know its going to be a long hard road with lots of sweat, and tears, just hopefully no blood! I have FAITH, determination, as well as desire that the weight WILL come off. My next goal is to go out and buy an epliptical machine. Then making myself use it! I need to make a list of goals like I have read on other blogs. I am SO inspired all the other women I read about! I only hope that I can be as successful and as witty writing my blogs as some of you are! May your next year be happy and healthy!

Holidays are OVER, now let's get busy!

Today it has been 3 weeks since my lapband. I am 23 lbs. down. That was before Christmas Eve. I did ok on Christmas Eve because I'm not much of a prime rib person and I stayed away from the cookies, and lefse. I did have 2 glasses of wine but otherwise it was a good night. Now Christmas Day was anothe story. I made carmel rolls for breakfast, no problem there. Egg bake with sourdough bread, eggs,ham and cheese. LOVE IT! I had some of that eating REAL slow. On to my in-laws for dinner. No problems there, a little turkey, yes, a little stuffing and some jello. The problem?  The DAMN toffee that my sister-in-law and MIL make! I LOVE the stuff! My SIL make the kind with the buttery crackers as the bottom, OH so good. My MIL makes the real buttery toffee and dips it in chocolate and crushed pecans. Damn! sinful. I had a couple of pieces. It was screaming my name, I had to eat it to shut it up! I've done so good for 3 weeks. Today I had left over egg bake for breakfast and a real light lunch and then we took the kids to a movie. I did have a lemonade at the movie. Its the first thing like that I've had to drink besides water or an occasional Crystal light. It was sweet, almost to much so. Then we met with my sister and family, parents, my one brothers family and my other brother at the Pizza Ranch. I did pretty good for my first time eating out. We will see how the scale reacts to that damn toffee later this week. I really want to hit the 25lb.mark! Start out the New Year on the downward slide of the scale!

OH, what am I doing?

Its been a while. I'm just not sure what I'm doing. I have this thing in my body and I'm trying hard, but I'm still HUNGRY! I've been doing good, but the weight is hardly moving. I have started to excercise. OK, its not a lot but at least I'm moving! Its right before Christmas and I'm trying to get everything done. I've done a lot of walking and I finally hooked up the Wii Fit I've had for a year and a half. I have to fudge some things on there though because I weight to much for the board! How defeating is that?! I'm 2.5 pounds to heavy. I hope by next week I can stand on the damn thing! But its 20 pounds lighter than I was 16 days ago! I just wish this fat would melt faster! What do I want for Christmas? The next year and 100 pounds to go quickly and easily!

I'm on the way!

Had my first check-up with the dr. today. Discussed my shoulder pain, which is STILL there even after 8 days since surgery! He said it should go away by tomorrow! It feels better tonight but I think that is because according to their scale I have lost ......................16 pounds! Gone! Never to return! Relief! Now if only the rest can go as quickly as the first 16!

Today is Friday and 4 days since my band. I have been pretty miserable with gas pains but they are starting to subside! I finally ate something more than mush or jello! My wonderful hubby made me a scrammbled egg this morning and it smelled sooo good! But I only got about 3/4 of it gone chewing REAL slow but I just couldn't finish it! I'm still really tired, and that is just not me. I still feel weak, I'm sure that will go away in time. I'm sure I'll feel better tomorrow! I go back to the dr. and the nutritionist on Tues. so we will see what they have to see. I need to get moving, I still have lots to get done before christmas and of course I have a cookie exchange to go to on Tues. night. I'll  still bake cookies for my kids and thats what we have been giving to the neighbors and customers for years. I will just adjust! Hope everyone had a good Friday!

One day Post Op!

Surgery is DONE! Checked in @ 11:30 in the OR at 1 home by 5:25! Didn't sleep the best last night due to me being a side sleeper (kinda hard to do) so sleeping on my back propped up wasn't the most comfortable. Today mainly pain in my shoulders as well as feeling like I got punched in the gut! I've been reading other blogs today and getting ideas for some things to make differently. There are SO many clever people out there! I love to cook and that was one of my fears is that I would lose part of my identity by having this band put on. But I think that it is going to give me an opportunity to expand my cooking knowledge and experimentation! I'm sure tomorrow is going to be a great day!

Tomorrow is the day!

Tomorrow is the day that I get banded! My emotions are all over the place. I'm nervous. I don't want anything to go wrong. But I'm also angry today. Angry that I let myself get this way so that I'm in this position in the first place. Angry that I couldn't lose weight on my own. Angry that I have PCOS and that it makes it harder to lose weight. I'm excited. I can't wait for this surgery to be over so that I can get on with losing weight. Determination. I'm going to do this! Sadness. I'm sad that I've waited so long. I could go on and on and find a number of reasons for a number of emotions.

 I have 3 young children (Daniel-6, Bryce-4, & Brooklyn-2). What if something goes wrong and I'm not here to see them through life? But if I don't have this surgery I'm doing the same thing, just in a slower way. I've wanted these children for so long and adopting them with my wonderful husband Mike is what I have said is the "3 Best decisions that we have ever made". I want to lose this weight for ME but also for me to have a better relationship with these 3 amazing children. I want to go to Disney World with them and be able to ride the rides, walk all over and see everything that there is to see through their eyes and create wonderful family memories! I know that I'm still going to tire easier than they will, I'm over 40 for cripes sake, but I know that I won't make it a mile like I am now! I have a goal to reach for and I have a daily reminder of that goal, my kids. Nothing is going to stop me!