The scale read 336.7 lbs. today. Last week it was 339.5, so just about 3 lbs! OK so its 2.8 right? I didn't get a lot of sleep last night, so my math is fuzzy this morning and coffee hasn't kicked in yet! Over 36 lbs in 7 1/2 weeks. I'm happy with the results but I'm kicking myself wondering if it could of been more if I had kept my flippin hands out of the Cheetos bag when giving my kids a snack! I think I need another fill. The first fill last week I don't think did a thing! I am HUNGRY! I fight it as much as I can, I'm working out more. I know I can't complain about almost 3 lbs. but I'm so eager for more weight loss.
I know that I feel better. Its so surreal. I have weighed this amount in the past, heck it was 2 years ago that I had done the Ideal Weigh Protein Diet and lost this much weight and then as soon as I stopped eating their outrageously priced "food", the weight came back on! I have so much more energy and I do feel better. The other day I was putting some food away in my pantry I looked at some of the stuff in there and got to looking at things and then the next thing I knew I was ripping it apart taking everything out. I got rid of a bunch of crap that didn't need to be in there anymore. I chucked a bunch and donated some stuff. I washed shelves and the floors and then reorganized. Now there still is some stuff in there I can't have but my husband and kids can. I know that if they support me all of it should be gone. I don't agree with that. My kids and husband don't force me to put food in my mouth, and if I really wanted it I would get it anyway. I can get a bag of Cheetos at the gas station. McDonald's is right down the road. I have to get it through my head that I can NOT eat that stuff and lose weight.
Its the same thing my friend is going through. I have a friend "L" and she has an alcohol problem. She used to be a big girl then she had gastric by-pass about 10 years ago. She then got really skinny and then the problems started. She started drinking beer, a LOT of beer. She got attention from men that she hadn't had before, she cheated on her husband, ended up divorced, lost her job, and has almost lost her life twice now because of her alcoholism. I'm trying to be a good friend because just like alcohol, her weight does not define who she is. But I know I need food to survive I just have to control the amount. Yes, we need to drink, but WATER is the only thing we really need in liquid form. Its hard to understand alcoholism and weight issues. I pray that L is working through her issues and will not drink anymore. She has a boyfriend that I feel is not good for her. I know her family thinks that too, but L doesn't want to be alone, it another one of those issues we have. She used to turn to food to comfort her, then it was alcohol, and now that she doesn't have either of those she clings to someone who is bad for her and her sobriety. I know this is bad, but I'm a little relieved that I have L in my life so that I can see what NOT to do after weight loss surgery! I hope and pray that she turns her life around and I will be there for her every step of the way. She is a cheerleader for me too.
I guess after re-reading this the point is we all have battles, and we all need support. None of us is immune. We all eat for different reasons. I will share some of mine in the future. I need to think about how exactly to say it. You can see that I ramble a bit, I need to organize my thoughts better! Maybe after more than 4 hours sleep. That was because hubby was out on an accident call at 4am and I didn't go to bed until midnight. I would of went back to sleep but with hubby out, my mind thinks of the accident and prays for the people involved. It doesn't help that the damn dog barks at every little sound either while he's gone!